Jhasmyne

The art of pursuing is a man’s job. From that statement alone, you may be disagreeing with me right now but I’m not surprised. This is a concept that I’ve struggled with a lot in my time as a Christian. It just seems so old-age, right? I mean, this is the twenty-first century, isn’t it? I always felt like statements like the first sentence I typed were sexist and demeaning to women, but on the topic of relationships and pursuing/ initiating, God has revealed to me His truth. This may be the twenty-first century and women may have done a lot for themselves (and I commend them), but our God is the God who is the same today, tomorrow, and yesterday. Women try so hard to make themselves equal to men when, in reality, that was never God’s intention. Men were intended to be the protectors and women the protected. Men were intended to be the providers and women the provided. Men were intended to be the pursuers and women the pursued.

So women, I encourage you to wait. Wait upon that godly man because when the time is right, God will send him to you and you will be pursued. Don’t initiate anything because it’s not your place to do so. God intended for men to be real men. And not just real men but real men of God. So as you patiently pray, God will prepare your prince to be the man you deserve as His beloved princess. Don’t sabotage that glorious gift by trying to be “the man.” Otherwise, you’ll end up with a coward. So why would you intentionally pursue a womanly coward who’s not worthy of you when God is preparing a courageous prince? Be the woman God made you to be before he pursues you, while he pursues you, and after he pursues you—quiet and submissive.

And men, be men! Wait on God and pray diligently. Don’t go when God tells you to wait and don’t wait when He tells you to go. His timing is perfect whether you think it is or not. Don’t be lazy or cowardly. Stay faithful to your convictions and don’t pursue every pretty face you see because doing that will make it so much more difficult to recognize the beautiful daughter that God has been preparing for you. Be the man that God called you to be; protect her, pursue her, and provide for her (in God’s timing, of course). But a word of advice: protect all your sisters in Christ, not just the one God chooses for you to pursue and provide for. Guard every woman’s heart as her brother in Christ as best as you can for this is your job as a godly man.

Above all, we are called to love our brothers and sisters in Christ. Truly loving one another the way we were meant to makes going against the rest of society and dying to ourselves even a little easier. Love allows us to be who God called us to be, love is what fulfills all of God’s commands, and “it is love that strengthens the church.” 1 Corinthians 8:1.